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9.04.2002
Happy Birthday Dad!
Long-time Japhy readers know that my Dad is quite a character. No, she's not quite Margaret Cho's mother, but he's up there. See, his hobby is genealogy. My family used to be Polish. Good ole, dumb Polacks. We even owned a solar-powered flashlight (remember when those were actually a joke...and not a real honest to goodness camping accesory?) Then my Dad started digging around a little bit. You see, the records say we're from Belarus. And that we're Jewish. Geneology fever even struck me, and I found our coat-of-arms was a Russian Imperial Eagle...with a Star of David where the eagle's head used to be! So, I'm really a Russian Jew. But then, my Dad remembered my grandfather liked herring. So, now- we're Finnish. Because Finns eat herring, see?
The one thing that he has been consistent enough about is his Native American heritage. No armchair Indian, Dad's been to pow-wows (His native name translates as 'Crazy White Guy who Buys Our Crap') and has danced in the ceremonial vetrans dance and laughed with the other natives as they shun my mother for being so white.
In any event, today is his birthday and I managed to find an e-card site for the discerning Native American. I should make it clear that my Dad's card is about the evil white oppressers that have held down our people for generations...and not about my Dad, lest you get the wrong impression. I love my Dad, no matter how much he's obliterated my cultural identity. Happy Birthday Dad!
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