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japhyjunket |
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THE
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5.01.2003
I Just Looked in the Mirror and My Hair Looks Like Daryl Hannah ala Bladerunner and I've heard this Damn Beck Song ("Lost Cause") 32 Times in the Last Three Hours.
Ah, May Day: That verdant time of year when dirty Communists join hands with flaky Wiccans and dance around the traditional May Day statue of Lenin tonguing Beltane, He Who Works The Way Of Life. In the poorly paraphrased words of Russian funnyman and Branson celebrity, Yakov Smirnov, "What a holiday!". Incidentally, Yakov recently performed two (count em'!) TWO shows on Broadway (brought to you by The Roundabout Theatre Company- The Roundabout: If We're Not Changing around our season for no reason, then we are selling out- OR YOUR MONEY BACK!). My theory behind "Yakov Smirnov: LIVE on Broadway" was it was put up simply so Mr. Smirnov will now return to his Yakov Smirnov Theatre in Branson and will forevermore be introduced as "Direct from his Broadway appearance, iiiiit's Yakov!". But, I digress. Let's return to the topic at hand. Which was? Oh, yes:
Sleep. Sweet sweet sleep. It's almost five in the morning now and while I sorely wish my play was finished, it is not to be. It will be there for me tomorrow, staring at me with it's beady black and white Courier-font eyes. Kids, never become a writer, for words in the end are as hollow as a Commies' revolutionary promise, as irritating as a neo-pagan's skyclad smudgestick ritual, and when you want words to be funny, they give you Yakov Smirnov.
(insert sound of head crashing onto keyboard now)
That sound- for those interested in the rubrics of onomatopoeia- that sound is "Ouf".
By the way: It was recently mentioned to me that my blog makes me sound like I am not enjoying myself while writing these blogs. Well guess what bunions, I'm not. There is a person who I met off the internet and they have worked their way into my life, stealing my credit cards, stealing my identity, and threatening to end my brief brief life unless I continue writing blogs. It's like "Misery", but without Kathy Bates' pleasingly plump bedside manner. More details to follow.
Is this the lead in to an online whodunit blog mystery, you ask? You bet.
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