Japhy is Having More Fun Than You Are One never knows what will happen at Fiammi. Rather than talk about the party, per se- let's focus on this photo of the party- ya know, as a piece of art. Fantastic composition, yes, the use of color sublimely restrained and the subjects are at once beautiful and horrifying. Let's break it down shall we? From left to right, we begin with T.Sammi. Her face draws us in with its beguiling smile, yet look into her eyes- is that fear, is it embarrassment we see? "What's that purrty gal with the pre-Raphaelite hair worried about?", asks Cletus, the slack-jawed art connoisseur. She's like the Mona Lisa. She's got a secret and that secret is that she's sober. Foolish Sammi, hasn't anyone told you that your inhibitions and fear melt away in the sweet baths of liquor? Next to Sammi is someone who clearly knows the bottle well. Look at his rugged, manly physique, poking through and held aloft by a bevy of arms. A more discerning viewer will notice that Sammi, for all of her nervous wariness is, in fact, holding my ass! Truly, a greater contrast between Apollonian serenity and Dionysian squalor the world has never seen. Is my mouth open in pleasure or pain? Oh the duality! Perhaps, as we move to our right and take Dyann into the picture, we can reassess this image as something of a Bacchanal Piéta. Dyann here becomes the Mother Mary, holding the Christ-like (well, emaciated) body of Japhy in a tender, motherly embrace. Sammi then becomes an Angel of God, pulling me heavenwardd by holding my ass. And then of course, Denver, just right of Dyann, becomes a demon, pulling me down into the fiery depths, cackling all the while. And in the fiery pits of hell resides the cool, very very evil, pink-gingham wearing Overlord of Darkness herself- Satan...or Laura, as the case may be. If only Michelangelo could have sculpted such intertwining, sinewy madness, he would have achieved the greatness that the artist of this masterpiece, who is, as you may have guessed, none other than the dear darling, spawn-mother of my children, Fiona. Truly, Fi- you have created a work for the ages. It's also entirely possible that drunkards should just be kept away from cameras, because, Jimminy Cricket, they act like fools.

posted by Japhy at 7/23/2003 09:33:00 AM || #